eggstone2000: or those wacky, wacky helmets with drink holders built onto the sides and straws coming down to our mouths.� maybe trick them out by adding lampshades.� "dude!� you are killing two birds with one stone!� you have the drink-holder hat and a lampshade on, at the same time.� you guys are totally professional."
kit carter: we're drunk in the 80s, yo!
eggstone2000: then we release the cd compilation.� camaro mullet guys all across the country will be going

"hey d000000d. wut's that awesome butt rock cd you're listening to?"
"yo, it's just a little thing called drunk in the 80s.� what, you don't own it yet?"
"um..... no... but i'm gonna go order it right now..." (shuffles off in complete embarrassment)

then the monster truck rally voiceover guy says "DO YOU WANT TO BE THAT GUY?!?� ORDER NOW NOW NOW!!� IF YOU DON'T OWN DRUNK IN THE 80S, YOU MAY AS WELL SHAVE YOUR MULLET OFF!!!!� and then get accidentally shot in the ass by one of your buddies while out on a drunken hunting trip."
kit carter: your jeans are NOT tight enough or washed in nearly enough acid!� you are not nearly drunk enough, obviously!
eggstone2000: you don't have nearly enough mangy dogs living under your porch!!

i went to see mr. quintron play last weekend, and that was pretty good.� he was like "hi, i'm a rapper and my new group is called drum buddy bad ass and i have breakdancers."� i was like "hi, i have this totally fly russian sailor hat.� can we take a picture?"� and he was like "yes!"� i also bought this really cool video from him, where he pimps his homemade drum machine synthesizer thing.

then i went to see sonic boom play at some bar down by the docks.� he was good, too.� too bad he totally shot his own career in the foot with these abstract "bloop bloop bloop, squeeeeee squeeeeee" synthesizer records... and has to play at places like that to tiny crowds, while spiritualized guy is livin' it up like some big rockstar just because he is probably --like-- writing songs.� but daniel johnston and mudhoney covers?� lots of slow, 80s british stoner rock?� mmmmm.